From pulling together the Thanksgiving feast to shopping, decorating and baking, the holiday hustle and bustle is enough to leave anyone frazzled. Do not let conflict over visitation schedules compound your seasonal stress.

Your holiday schedule determines where children spend time on special occasions and overrides the regular parenting plan to ensure each parent can celebrate holidays and milestones with the children. It is smart to make a comprehensive plan for the year, including all major national holidays, religious holidays, your child’s birthday, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, and extended school breaks.

A Pittsburgh custody attorney can review your current parenting schedule and help you create a plan for the holidays that keeps the season jolly.

How Should We Divide Holidays?

There are a variety of ways families schedule holiday custody time. Some parents choose to alternate major holidays (one parent takes Thanksgiving, the other takes Christmas) while others like to split up holidays with the children spending part of the day with each parent. For many families, spreading events over several days (one parent celebrates on Christmas Eve, the other on Christmas Day) gives everyone a chance to celebrate. Other families may streamline things with each parent having the same fixed holidays year after year.

Planning ahead is important as it sets reasonable expectations for the season and minimizes the potential for conflict. But the holiday season can be hectic with visits from extended family, time off from school and work and extra expenses cropping up at every turn. Being prepared is important, but maintaining flexibility to deal with unforeseen circumstances is also helpful. It is a wonderful season to show your co-parent some grace.

What Details Should Our Plan Include?

To keep things running smoothly, your holiday custody schedule should specify the details of custody exchanges, providing exact times and locations to prevent confusion and conflict.

It is important to consider travel arrangements when formulating your schedule. Account for the time required to get your kids from point A to point B and factor that travel time into the schedule. Plan exchanges and travel to minimize disruption for the children.

Holiday custody schedules are not one-size-fits-all. Your family’s needs and desires will evolve as your children grow, so adjust the schedule to accommodate the kids’ changing needs. A schedule created when your children are toddlers is not likely to work as well when you have teens. Revising the schedule over time will help you meet your kids’ needs while giving you flexibility to create new holiday traditions.

Give the Gift of Communication & Compromise

Hurt feelings and frustration can be part of the divorce process, but the holidays are a prime time to put those emotions aside and focus on what is best for your children.

Embrace flexibility and creativity to try to give everyone a special holiday. Consider hosting your Thanksgiving dinner on Black Friday or holding an early countdown to the New Year if switching things up creates more opportunities for your children to have meaningful celebrations with family and friends.

You may want to add a formal clause to your custody schedule regarding unexpected circumstances during the holidays, or you can address those situations as they arise. Either way, the holidays are a great reason for you and your co-parent to open the channels of communication and work together to create a memorable season for your children.

Do this in advance. Remember, it is not an “emergency” to the Court when we have the holidays on a calendar each year, well in advance.

Contact a Pittsburgh Custody Attorney in Pittsburgh Today

An experienced Pittsburgh custody lawyer can help you generate positive and creative solutions for celebrating the holidays with your children. Check out our short video about how to avoid headaches and frustration over holiday custody and contact Pollock Begg today to find an experienced custody attorney who can assist you in tailoring a holiday schedule to meet your unique needs. We have seen a lot of scenarios over the years during the holidays, and we can help you by providing guidance and expertise.